Almighty Dollar

Now Or Never

Posts tagged satire

6 notes

Extraterrestrials seem to have better understanding of us than we do ourselves

Breaking News from Outer Space (image source: Ponzi message)

This just in: a message from the PONZI SYSTEM believed to be in response to one of the Pioneer plaques which were placed on board the 1972 Pioneer 10 and 1973 Pioneer 11 spacecrafts, featuring a pictorial message, in case either Pioneer 10 or 11 was intercepted by extraterrestrial life. 

Pioneer plaque (image source:  Pioneer Message)

Astronomers believe the Ponzis did in fact intercept one of the Pioneer plaques and have attempted to answer in kind with a pictogram they believe we should have no difficulty comprehending in view of our preoccupation with money. Further investigation will of course be necessary, they caution, to determine the exact origin of this message.

Filed under Pioneer plaque Ponzi system SETI economics economy extraterrestrial life news news from space politics satire humor

13 notes

An Open Letter to Ben Bernanke
This is must-read devastating tongue-in-cheek satire aimed directly at Helicopter Ben. My guess is that the threatening cowboy referred to in the letter would be none other than Ron Paul.

by Wolf Richter for Business Insider, posted  Aug. 30, 2011
Dear Ben,
Please print us more money. We want you to prop up the stock market.
Everybody knows it’s a Ponzi scheme that will collapse without your support.
You don’t want us to end up like Bernie Madoff’s clients.
No, Ben, we love Ponzi schemes. We get in early and get out before they collapse.
That’s why we’re rich. The bad thing is that they sometimes collapse before we can get out.
But you already bailed us out twice in the last couple of years through printing trillions of dollars. Why not a third time?
That will also keep the bond-market bubble inflated. We have to admit that you’ve done an excellent job there, hands down. Negative real yields all the way up the yield curve!
Awesome. Now if you could just print a few trillions and buy up the sovereigns from the PIIGS. Euro crisis over. End of story. And we’d get richer because we’d sell them to you at face value though we bought them at fifty cents on the dollar.
And why not forever? Just keep printing. Because as soon as you stop, stock markets will crash again, and credit markets will seize, and then we’re back on this awful ride to hell.
Of course, it’ll cause inflation, which is good. You yourself said that. You stated many times that you want inflation. In fact, you said that one of the goals of the Fed, after propping up the markets, is to create inflation. So stick to it, Ben. Don’t slack off suddenly just because some cowboy threatened you.
 Read more: 
 
Dear Ben, Please Print Us More Money

An Open Letter to Ben Bernanke

This is must-read devastating tongue-in-cheek satire aimed directly at Helicopter Ben. My guess is that the threatening cowboy referred to in the letter would be none other than Ron Paul.

by Wolf Richter for Business Insider, posted  Aug. 30, 2011

Dear Ben,

Please print us more money. We want you to prop up the stock market.

Everybody knows it’s a Ponzi scheme that will collapse without your support.

You don’t want us to end up like Bernie Madoff’s clients.

No, Ben, we love Ponzi schemes. We get in early and get out before they collapse.

That’s why we’re rich. The bad thing is that they sometimes collapse before we can get out.

But you already bailed us out twice in the last couple of years through printing trillions of dollars. Why not a third time?

That will also keep the bond-market bubble inflated. We have to admit that you’ve done an excellent job there, hands down. Negative real yields all the way up the yield curve!

Awesome. Now if you could just print a few trillions and buy up the sovereigns from the PIIGS. Euro crisis over. End of story. And we’d get richer because we’d sell them to you at face value though we bought them at fifty cents on the dollar.

And why not forever? Just keep printing. Because as soon as you stop, stock markets will crash again, and credit markets will seize, and then we’re back on this awful ride to hell.

Of course, it’ll cause inflation, which is good. You yourself said that. You stated many times that you want inflation. In fact, you said that one of the goals of the Fed, after propping up the markets, is to create inflation. So stick to it, Ben. Don’t slack off suddenly just because some cowboy threatened you.

Read more: 

Dear Ben, Please Print Us More Money

Filed under economy economics politics academic economists Ben Bernanke Helicopter Ben satire economic satire Fed Federal Reserve Ponzi scheme stock market bond market bond market bubble paper money fiat money inflation Ron Paul

20 notes

This should tickle your funny bone, assuming it hasn’t already dried up and blown away. Sounds a bit like traditional Americana post-depression music to me, but this is bona fide 21st century post-great recession fare.

"No Banker Left Behind" is the opening track of Ry Cooder’s 2011 album "Pull Up Some Dust and Sit Down," available as a free download when you pre-order the album (out on August 30, 2011.) Order album at http://www.nonesuch.com/albums/pull-up-some-dust-and-sit-down.

Filed under economy economics bankers ry cooder no banker left behind wall street bailouts bailout pull up some dust and sit down nonesuch nonesuch records truthdig guitar song satire